Think Maintenance in Relationships

Well, you guessed it, this short article is a reminder of the importance of maintaining relationships, either with co-workers, loved ones, or friends.

Since our childhood, we are taught how to get things but not how to maintain them, including relationships.

Did you know that there are strong similarities between a tooth, a car, and your relationship? Well, if you do not maintain them, they break, vanish, or disappear.

Let’s not paint everyone with the same brush; some people have a schedule to maintain their cars. Do you know why? Because they know from experience, how expensive it will be if the car is not maintained. The same goes for your teeth. Not only do you have to brush them regularly, but also it is highly recommended to visit a dentist twice a year for a check-up.

However, we tend to forget how expensive it is to not maintain our relationships with loved ones and colleagues. Without maintenance, conflicts erupt between couples and coworkers, which might lead to breakups, divorces, and resignations. We all know that the result of conflicts is costly both emotionally and financially. For our defense, we live in a society that is more about how to get a job and relationship status, rather than how to maintain them. Add to that, we are entangled in our daily life, stuck in routines, and distracted by too much noise that comes from all directions.

So how do we maintain relationships with our loved ones and colleagues? There are five steps to overcome the challenge:

It might sound cliche, but the first step is to focus on yourself. You have to take the time to know and check your inner dashboard; like your car’s dashboard. It is important to understand each instrument and what kind of information it conveys, such as temperature, fuel levels, etc. You have to be aware of the events that affect you; identify when you are happy, annoyed, angry, upset, etc. Then do the same work to decipher the dashboards of your loved ones and colleagues. I am going to be honest here; those first two steps might take a long time to be understood. So equip yourself with a lot of patience and the willingness to listen.

Once you start to get an idea about those dashboards, take time to list any actions/behaviors that nourish and strengthen healthy relationships and reduce or eliminate any actions/behaviors that either diminish or break relationships.

The next step is to act upon the previous list in real life. From my personal experience, this step is a teamwork task; you will get better results if you reveal and share the list with the people around you, as you will help each other be more aware of each other’s behavior and actions. There is a chance that they are facing the same challenges as well.

The last step is to go back regularly to the four previous stages, to update and review the list, and check your progress.

Five steps to maintain healthy relationships with co-workers and loved ones

Maintaining good relationships has numerous benefits, such as overall stress reduction and less conflict.

The steps above are the main steps that I believe will help you to maintain strong and healthy relationships. Let me know your best techniques and tips to maintain your relationships.

Originally published at



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Mustapha Mekhatria

Mustapha Mekhatria


I strongly believe that “everything is easy to understand”, if taught well :)